I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
