she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
