So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
