I want to walk on stilts...naked
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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