is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
