About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
