I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
