She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
you win again, gameday.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize
