are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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