Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
