I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
