Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
