He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
