spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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