She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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