Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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