She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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