roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
