Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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