Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
