She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Randomize
