I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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