I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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