Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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