Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
