you're like a bully in the Christmas story
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
