And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
