Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i think my mom watched the whole time
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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