Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize