You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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