3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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