did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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