So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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