Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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