i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
