So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
