just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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