ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
