so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
sex in a hospital.. check
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
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