so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
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