Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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