I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
