i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
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