He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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