He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
