So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
