but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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