what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
