after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
