is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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